Okay, I do know why I love it.
First, Defender of the Integrity of the Color Red and Let Me Tell You About Color Theory: shine the hell on you crazy diamonds. My greatest hope is more random appearances of color theory in borderline applicable posts; in this case, technically speaking, it was rather applicable in letter if not in spirit. And the chart showing positive associations with red…I mean, I didn’t realize they did indeed outnumber the negative, so I learned something new.
Second, this post encapsulates one of the many reasons why tumblr is a hellsite none of us will ever actually leave. We all–every one of us–is brimming over with far too much information and enthusiasm about a subject so niche that outside academia or some poorly considered acid trips in college there is literally never an opportunity to even segue into it IRL and you can only adhoc lecture on the subject to an empty room so many times; it’s lonely, sure, but you’re super tired of restraining orders so no more street corners or coffee shops for you, buddy. No, you were not holding anyone hostage, either, at least by any legal definition, and the judge agreed, so good job, lawyer.
Tumblr though…here, no matter what that interest or niche is or how incredibly unlikely anything related to it could possibly come up, someone will post something with a set of words that could reasonably be inferred as Invitation to Speak On My Topic, Fuck Yes I Was Waiting For This. You may have to squint for ‘reasonable’ but if you have an interest, you will make it work.
So let’s not pretend any of us have ever–even once–resisted the siren call of Thing I Want to Talk About Until You Wish You Were Dead But You Can’t Stop Me So I Win. Color theory, the glory of graphene, deeply unsettling facts about snails, top ten lists of personally terrifying lakes, the evils of mint and a short history of brutal mint invasions into unsuspecting yards, Victorian nipple play, we all have one of these and these comprise subjects fairy easy to find a jump point.
And as a one, we all value those posts; who didn’t suddenly look at mint in a totally different way? Who is terrified to go to England because you’re pretty sure the Strid will somehow find you? I rest my case.
Each of us–in our own way–have looked upon the equivalent of a blood soaked hallway and thought–and were not wrong–”It’s finally happened. I can tell them they are maligning the color red and explain exactly why. Color theory.”
Thank you for your time.